The cannibal’s arrival in the most mainstream of genres, the Young Adult novel, speaks to the state of a publishing culture which celebrates diversity of all sorts but no genuine divergence from the party line, which has little interest in the lives of animals and even less to say about the reality of meat. This chapter focuses on the curious relationship between meat-eating, sex, and degrees of abstinence in Camille DeAngelis’s Bones and All, Chelsea G. Summers’s A Certain Hunger, and Isaac Marion’s Warm Bodies, but a major part of it will be devoted to reading, by way of contrast, Rachel Ingalls’s Mrs Caliban, which is easily the most romantic of the four, not least because its cannibal hero is wrongly accused. By bringing cannibal studies and vegan studies into conversation, I argue that when we follow what Emelia Quinn calls the ‘monstrous vegan’ into the American novel, the monster’s literary function undergoes a genuinely romantic transformation. Indeed, Mr Caliban’s refusal to eat meat is far more monstrous than any cannibal can claim.