Writing My Self Back Together

I met Hélène in the first year of my academic journey and the same year that the medical profession first acknowledged the voices in my mind. I was stagnating in a degree of old male philosophers, and I grabbed at her hand, never knowing whether she would pull me out or pull me in. Through the intervening (26) years I have written myself into a (no)woman’s land. There I am. (Where am I?) Now I am returning to Hélène, reaching out for her fingertips in the knowledge that she will be my wild guide back to my mindbody. I will not turn my face away from my circled truth. I will not silence my voices with randomised controlled trials and peer-reviewed papers and academic citizenship. In this chapter I bring my writing back to my self.