From fixing to connecting: parents’ experiences supporting adult children with eating disorders

Unlike evidence-based guidelines that exist for families of youth with eating disorders, little is known about the optimal role for families of adult patients. Given issues of patient autonomy and confidentiality, it is common for family members to report high levels of distress, confusion about how to offer support, and feelings of exclusion. Nevertheless, interactions with parents play a critical role in the recovery process. The purpose of this research was to increase understanding of support experiences of parents of adult children while identifying what they believe to be the most beneficial forms of support.

Sixteen parents of adults who were either recovered or actively engaged in intensive eating disorders treatment participated in semi-structured interviews. Participants were asked to describe the nature of their relationship, beliefs about their child’s support needs, and factors that challenged or facilitated their capacity to offer what they deemed as optimal support.

In the context of receiving support and practicing self-care, parents’ aspiration shifted from fixing the eating disorder to prioritizing a relational goal of unrelenting connection with their child. Achieving this involved three key skills: managing reactions and expectations, learning boundaries, and practicing validation.

This research highlights the ongoing challenges faced by parents, indicating that interventions aimed at supporting their own well-being and fostering connection with their child may be of benefit.