“As one grows older, the hidden meaning and importance of being a practicing Shia becomes clearer”: voices of Shia women married to Sunni men

Intersectarian marriages in Islam have been an area of interest, but with very little empirical research. Scholarship suggests that Muslim Shia women believe that intersectarian marriages with Sunni men would have negative consequences on their wellbeing, overall family quality of life, and create tension for any children born (Cappucci in J Muslim Minor Aff 36(4):561–568, 2016). Through qualitative interviews with Pakistani Shia women, who chose to marry Sunni men for love and now have children from the marriage, this study aims to understand participant feelings and experiences pre and post marriage. The study identifies six themes pre-marriage and another six themes post-marriage which are more dire and a cause of concern, including: (i) Never-ending shaming by relatives and in-laws taking a toll over time; (ii) Differences in legal issues, prayers, and rituals creating difficulties after a few years of marriage; (iii) Children following the beliefs of the father causing great pain to mother; (iv) Feelings of immense guilt for abandoning the Shia faith; (v) Turning to lies and hiding information from spouse; and (vi) Fear for Afterlife. The paper concludes with a discussion and recommendation for improved support of women in intersectarian marriages related to counseling and legal reform.