Hide and Seek with Finances: Financial Infidelity and Financial Snooping in Relationships

When in a relationship, a person’s financial situation may impact not only themselves but also their partner, making information about income, debt, and spending meaningful. Relationship partners may sometimes turn to clandestine means of protecting or seeking this financial information. This study examines the interplay of how partners handle financial information. In a longitudinal study of 124 couples, both partners reported on financial infidelity (hiding financial information) and financial snooping (covertly seeking financial information) at the beginning of a month and over the course of the month. Participants with worse communication skills reported both more positive financial infidelity attitudes and more positive snooping attitudes. Across the month, participants reported hiding more financial information if their partner reported snooping more (and vice versa), suggesting a mutuality of secretive financial behaviors. Participants with partners who hid more financial information and had more positive financial infidelity attitudes, as well as those who engaged in more financial snooping during the study, reported decreasing financial harmony at the end of the study. Participants who hid more financial information during the study reported less relationship satisfaction at the end of the study. In sum, this study underlines the importance of open communication about finances in relationships.