Relationship Undermining in Couple Therapy

We examined the prevalence of relationship undermining statements by therapists treating couples, as reported by clients, and the association of these statements with outcomes. Participants (n = 270) reported on recollections of their therapist saying that they were incompatible, that therapist could not help them, that the relationship was beyond repair, that divorce was the best or most realistic option, or told one of partners that the other had a personality problem, or proposed individual therapy instead of couple therapy. Findings showed a prevalence rate of 10-28% across these five undermining statements; 40% of clients reported at least one statement. Undermining statements were associated with poorer outcomes and shorter duration of couple therapy. We suggest that some therapists treating couples lack a systemic/relationship framework and set of skills, which leads them to become frustrated and pessimistic with difficult couple cases. We offer implications for the training of couple therapists.